Contents:
a. Who satan is and his merciless war against God and His
creations;
b. God's heart vs. an abuser's heart
c. SRA - satan takes it one step further
Who satan is and his merciless war against God and His
creations
Scripture points out that satan is a liar, thief and a
destroyer. he wants desperately to hurt God in any way he can.
and he is the continual accuser of God's children. he knows he
will ultimately lose his rebellious war but tries to keep us
from reaching out to God. If we do reach out to God and accept
Jesus into our hearts, he tries to do everything he can to keep
us from ever connecting with God in a way that God desires most
- knowing the height, depth, width and breadth of Jesus'
incredibly deep and lavish love for us.
Our experiential walk of trust with Jesus is the foundation for
real fellowship and sweet intimacy with Him that we are designed
as God's children to enjoy. That fellowship is why God created
us in the first place. To know God and enjoy Him forever. What
better assault on God than to assault the heart of a child
before they are old enough to even know what damage is being
done to them?
satan is insidious and can't create anything on his own so
counterfeits everything that God really is, making it easier to
reject God's love and nature if we are hurt by any of his
counterfeits. satan hates it that God has children - and created
human beings to be in loving fellowship with Him. satan can't
create; he can't create children. satan knows God well. he was
an angel of light and enjoyed God's presence before his
arrogance and prideful rebellion against God. satan knows the
incredible expanse of God's pure love. he was there. he basked
in that love as the worship leader before his rebellion (desire
to BE God). satan knows if we, as God's children, get the
slightest taste of God's goodness and heart, he will forever
lose any stronghold on our lives.
Who would refuse such purity, love and security if we
experienced just a taste? The slightest taste of God's pure love
would create an insatiable hunger and thirst for more (like a
new couple getting to know each other - they increasingly spend
time together, much to the exclusion of everyone and everything
else). satan sets out to make sure no one gets that taste - or
determines to ruin our connectors that make matching up with God
impossible. And where better to start than in the trusting,
open, vulnerable heart of a child? satan knows how to hurt God
where it hurts - in the hearts of children, created by God,
Himself for His pleasure and our pleasure and good.
God's Heart vs. an abusers heart
When we have been hurt by someone's actions, and then encounter
something that "feels" the same from God, we instinctively avoid
the pain and move away, saying, "No thanks. Been there, done
that." We lose the gifts God has for us because we recoil from
the pain of the last encounter. satan knows he may lose this war
on the eternal destiny of our souls but he tries his best to
keep anyone from accepting God's payment for our sin. Many will
accept Jesus into their hearts but he also knows God IS love.
Love permeates His entire Being. If satan can keep us from
breaking through, separating God's nature from the lies we
learned through hurtful experiences and abuse, satan still wins
- I may gain eternal life through Jesus Christ, but never
experience the joy of intimately being connected to God through
Jesus Christ and enjoying the safety, security and love that He
offers me here as His beloved child.
I
will have salvation and a head knowledge of God's goodness but
no intimacy; no joy. God's design is to reveal His nature in the
hearts of godly parents for their children. Godly parents
role-model sacrificial love and trustworthy hearts to children,
making it very easy to transfer their trust to a loving heavenly
Father. A child rests in God's incredible Daddy heart just as
they run to their earthly Daddy for everything.
What better way to really hurt the deepest heart of God than to
destroy the very connectors to God in the tender hearts of
children through sexual abuse? Sexual abuse implants fear of
intimacy, inability to trust, fear of authority, silence,
secrecy, betrayal of love, protection, nurturing, restlessness,
and an inability to receive (or connect to) love, security,
value, being cherished, respected, etc.) in the unsuspecting
heart of a trusting child. It is soul murder.
The enemy of our souls thinks if he can use the unhealed wounds
in another person to assault a child sexually, that child loses
all connectors to God's open invitation to intimacy with Him.
satan forgets, though, the magnitude of God's power and gentle
strength in rebuilding what was thought permanently ruined
through abuse. satan mocks God for being patient, gentle,
merciful, loving and kind. Through sexual abuse, a child learns
to distrust all of these offers. But God knows love conquers
all. He patiently waits for us to struggle over separating out
His pure love over the "love" we've been force-fed in abuse as
children.
My difficulty in this journey is that God's ways seem so
similar to the abusers. But - His heart is in NO way the same as
abusers! Knowing His heart is what sets us free. Learning to
trust what He reveals about Himself in Scripture and accepting
that as Truth about what He is like (not what was role-modeled
or what we were told). The Truth is, God is in control. His love
is available as I learn to trust Him. He is the Potter, I am the
clay. He wants me moldable, pliable in His hands. He makes the
rules. I learn to live by them to experience the fullest of His
goodness for me. Trust is the basis for my relationship with
Him. That means I risk first. (I can tell you all day that I am
trustworthy but you will never experience that unless you
take a risk with me. Only my response to your risk will tell you
if I am trustworthy. When you take increasing risks with me, you
find me increasingly trustworthy and we are build a history
of trust. It is the same way with God.)
As I dare risk with God and find Him faithful, I have the
courage to risk again. I can look back on this history of trust
when facing a deeper risk - and say, "He was faithful all these
other times, I will dare to risk with Him on this issue." God's
heart is faithful and true. Scripture gives us the foundation by
telling us the truth of God's faithfulness and loving kindness.
I don't begin my adventure with Him until I start taking risks
with Him to find out for myself that He is faithful and good to
ME. God's heart is pure love. God is patient. He desires the
BEST for me.
As I said, it seems
God's ways are so similar to the abusers. The huge difference is
their hearts. Their motives. Their intents toward me. God
teaches that He is in control. I am not. I hear that and my
history (or past) rises up and says, "I will never let anyone
control me ever again!!!" God understands my wounded heart and
doesn't force me. But the truth of Who He is will never change.
I need to change my resistance to embrace God's truth. The huge
difference is His heart. God is in no way an abuser. His
heart cannot be bad in any single facet. He is pure love,
complete truth, fully trustworthy, full of mercy, grace and
compassion. He is gentle strength.
The enemy uses sexual abuse to terrify us of someone being in
control, of requiring that we embark on an adventure of risking
and trusting (building a history of trust with God), of becoming
increasingly dependent and vulnerable as a child. "We've been
there, done that, and learned never to let down our guard lest
the pain devour us again." God knows that becoming like little
children and trusting Him (in His love, might, power and
Fatherhood) is the only way into the Kingdom of Heaven here on
earth. He will forever be our Father, our Daddy.
As His children, He longs for us to run TO Him, not away from
Him. He wants to expose all the areas we run away from Him and
let us risk learning to trust Him there and find Him
trustworthy. If I really knew the depths of God's love for me in
those areas I run from Him, I wouldn't run away, I would run
to Him with my fears and hurts, trusting in His love above
all else. Sexual abuse ruins the natural inclination of a child
to run to the safety of God's loving arms. Parenting is God's
means to make it easy for a child to trust God. But when sexual
abuse comes in, those connectors to godly role-modeling of love
are destroyed.
An abuser's heart is incredibly wicked. He demands. He demands
to be in control. An abuser demands the trust of a child. An
abuser tries to steal, not redeem, the soul of a child. An
abuser ravages the innocence of a child. An abuser uses a child
to satisfy themselves. (God is NOT like this! But satan is! -
beware). An abuser doesn't know the meaning of the word love.
It's been destroyed in them a long time ago. They've surrendered
to the deceitful ploys of satan and are fully deceived. As a
result, children lose every connector they are naturally born
with to connect to a loving, trusting relationship to a loving,
trustworthy God and Father. Our only solace is that God is far
bigger than satan.
God allows the tender spirit of a child to be preserved in
dissociation and splitting so that the abuser cannot take that
from the child. God keeps what only belongs to God (our spirit)
until we can make that choice for Him later on. The abusers want
to own our souls. What grace that God allows us to creatively
hide the core of our being from the abusers! God waits until we
are older and patiently begins to woo our hearts with His love.
He helps us tear down those defenses (from abuse), restore our
fragmented will and God, Himself, restores the connectors to His
love experientially.
It means confronting much pain and many lies we've believed
about ourselves from the abuse. Lies we've believed about God,
our abusers and others. It means hanging onto God for increasing
revelation of God's heart for us and daring to risk when my
whole insides scream of the anguish of past risking and trusting
people. But God's heart is not at all like the abusers. Only as
I test that out, will I begin to taste the goodness of God that
satan meant to permanently destroy in my heart as a child.
What testimonies of God's gentle strength when children survive
such abuse (mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually),
and still, ultimately become tender, vulnerable, dependent
children of God, trusting in and relying on God ! ! for
everything like a child does with a godly parent!!!! God's love
conquers all. Perfect love casts out fear. Love heals deep
wounds and restores ravages souls. Love rebuilds the most broken
heart. It's the complete devestation of satan's plans for us.
God's purposes and plans for us, His children are far greater
than the enemy can ever bring to fruition. We are trophies of
God's immense grace and powerful redemptive love.
I long for the day when, as the fruits of my healing visible for
all to see and enjoy, satan is sorry for ever touching me!! I am
in passionate pursuit of dwelling in sweet fellowship and
intimacy with Jesus and God my Father. I look forward to moving
back the gates of hell and seeing the wounded restored out of
passionate devotion to the One who restored my shattered soul.
The enemy lost when he touched me with such devastation. What
satan meant for pure evil, God, in the richness of His pure
love, has redeemed and restored for my good and eternal joy!
SRA - satan takes it one step further
In SRA, satan builds on the platform of sexual abuse and further
counterfeits every good gift God has given to us to remind us of
His love and truth of who He IS. The very good things of
baptism, reconciliation at His altar, communion, His lavish love
for us in His voluntary and sinless death on the cross, His
extraordinary demonstration of incredible might and power in His
resurrection defeating death while offering grace and redemption
in glorious power -- these are all hideously counterfeited.
When, later
in life, I encounter these life-changing truths in my
relationship with Jesus and Scripture, old wounds build a
barricade of defense against the pain I already experienced in
the counterfeits. I may keep a wonderful "head" knowledge of
those truths, but lost my connector to it through the incredible
pain endured in the counterfeits and abuse. I can't possibly
allow that pain to be experienced, so I refuse the gifts God has
because they remind me of that pain. It's not a conscious
decision on my part; it's automatic. It will ultimately become
my choice, my decision as God patiently lavishes love on me and
gently breaks down my defense system and woos me to dare trust
Him in increasing measure to be different than the abusers.
